Responding to Others' Needs

Here are some suggestions for how you can enhance your skills in the leadership behaviours of Responding to Others’ Needs:

• Reflect on how you react when other people have made mistakes. Reflect also on how you react when people ask for support.
  • In order to aid this reflection, think about 3 or 4 interactions you have had over the last week(s) with colleagues.
  • Do you think your reactions promoted a sense of trust, empathy/concern, and support within the team?
  • If not, think about the implications of this on staff wellbeing and on team effectiveness
• If you think people do not approach you very often for support or to own up to mistakes, think about the reasons for this – are they afraid to do so?
• Think of a boss who mishandled your request for support, or following mistakes you made, despite the fact that you had tried your best in a difficult situation. What effect did her/his behaviour have on you? How would you have liked them to deal with the situation? Now think of a boss who helped you, without damaging your motivation and self-confidence. How does your typical behaviour compare with theirs in such situations? What can you learn from this?
• Regarding the handling of mistakes:
  • Most people don’t make a mistake intentionally and may have made it for good intentions, but didn’t have sufficient information, or weren’t aware of the boundaries of their role, or were unaware of the consequences of their actions.
  • Leadership is about transforming mistakes into learning situations and using the opportunity to strengthen, rather than damage, colleagues’ self-confidence and resilience.
  • Checkout why they did what they did and what was their desired outcome. If they weren’t aware of the consequences, explain what they were, while expressing your appreciation for their efforts to do something well.
  • Listen not only to the facts they explain, but also for their underlying emotions. Try to show empathy for their feelings, and, if possible, reflect them back to the person. For example, “If I had been in your situation, I would have felt xyz …” or “It sounds as though you might have felt uncomfortable to raise this issue?”, or “ Am I correct in sensing that this was rather stressful or felt out of your comfort zone?”
  • If the request is for support then checkout what would be the most useful for them, if they know what this is.
  • If they hadn’t been provided with the appropriate information, and this wasn’t their fault, then apologise genuinely.
  • In either case, ask them, in the light of this new information, what might be a better way of dealing with a similar situation, to encourage them to analyse, reflect, and learn from mistakes.
• Have you made any mistakes recently, or in the past? Staff often admire and respect bosses who admit when they have made a mistake, and, if appropriate apologised to whom they have affected, and/or used it as an example when they are helping a colleague to learn from a mistake. This is seen, typically, as a reflection of their integrity. Consider these experiencers in relation to your leadership behaviour with your team and relevant others.
• Given the greater complexity of the environment in which organisations operate, particularly since the Covid pandemic emerged, there will be a greater need to test out new structures, processes, and roles, which will inevitably lead to an increasing frequency of mistakes. But mistakes are like ‘cognitive catalysts’ since they challenge our beliefs as to what works and what doesn’t. What is crucial, is to create a culture where people feel safe to admit mistakes and to ask for support, and are provided with a form of leadership that trusts that they intend to do their best, and which encourages a learning and development opportunity.
• Another valuable activity in teams, is to regularly allocate time to share challenges, or events that haven’t gone as well as was expected, or mistakes – including contributions from yourself as a leader, if appropriate – and then to discuss and seek suggestions within the team as to what might be a solution.
• This is a powerful way of creating a learning environment. But it will only work if there is culture of ‘psychological safety’, in the team that is, where there is high trust and respect for each other and an absence of fear of being judged, shamed, or ‘losing face’ as a result of admitting one needs help, or having made a mistake, or of voicing an opinion. Research shows that such a culture characterises high-performing teams.
• Another useful starting point for increasing the extent to which people are willing to own up to mistakes or asking for support, would be to talk to colleagues on a regular basis, asking how they are and if there are any issues they want to raise – this would provide them with a platform to talk to you.
• Arrange a conversation with a trusted colleague or mentor, someone that people go to when they need support; ask for feedback on your performance in this area and try and identify actions that will help you develop and improve.